Subtle subconscious bias and gender

(written by Lawrence Krubner, however indented passages are often quotes)

Interesting:

Reacting to Subtle Discrimination

As discussed in Section , women are often the victims of subtle subconscious bias. For example, a woman may find that comments are primarily directed to men in a group, unintentionally leaving her out. If the woman does not feel comfortable directly confronting the individuals in question, there are more diplomatic methods of calling the behavior to the person’s attention:

In a meeting of three computer science students, the sole female found herself ignored by one of the male participants. Whenever she asked him a question, he directed his answer to the other male present. (See page of this report.) After the meeting, the woman took him aside and mentioned that she had noticed he had directed his answers to [John] and asked, in a concerned way, whether she had done anything to cause this behavior. When he replied that she had not done anything wrong and began to apologize, she dismissed his apologies by saying that she was just relieved she had not given him any negative signals. He continued to apologize.

The indirectness of her approach allowed the man to save face while still communicating the point. It appears to have been effective, because, when she saw the man later in the day, he made eye contact and spoke directly to her.

At a social occasion, a young woman found that a male relative directed serious discourse almost exclusively to her brother and not to her. When the woman was alone with the relative, she said to him, `I hope I haven’t given you the idea I’m not interested in your opinions on [X]. I noticed you directed your comments about it to [John]. I want you to know I am interested in what you have to say on the subject.’ The male relative replied, sincerely, that he had not realized she was interested in the topic and would include her in the future.

While some people might object to these oblique methods, as they involve the victim’s pretending to put the blame on herself, they are effective in situations where the woman does not feel comfortable being more direct, and they often elicit an apology.
Reacting to Overtly Sexist Comments

Indirect methods are also often more effective than direct means for dealing with offensive sexist and sexual comments. As mentioned in Section , the only consequence of complaining is often that one is dismissed as a `feminist’. In a recent column in The New York Times, a woman described her experience as a college journalist:

Though I was militantly middle of the road in perspective, by the second time I mentioned sexism in print I was pegged. People I met seemed to treat me like a Marxist, a radical, a testosterone-fueled male-basher; others asked me why I suddenly hated men so much; and certain folks at home warned me that I was going to jeopardize my future by scaring off potential male suitors [Kamen 1990].

Two techniques that are often more effective than anger (even when justified) are role reversal, which involves the substitution of other terms for female terms, and humor. Combinations of these two techniques are especially effective.
Role Reversal

Treating men in the manner in which they treat women can be an effective response to poor treatment:

One female computer scientist said:

I’m much more often complimented for my dress, my hair, or my accent than for the content of what I say and do. So I just turn the compliments around and tell men how pretty their ties are, or how the cut of their jackets bring out their broad shoulders. They squirm under such scrutiny just as we do [Frenkel 1990, page 41,].

When a group of men were unable to understand why women in the workplace were offended by posters of naked women, a woman put up a huge picture of a naked man. She was asked to take it down, communicating her point.